I wasn't spawned from a computer, just raised by one.

Saturday, January 16, 2010


I finished writing my New Year's Resolutions today. I know. Most people have already broken all theirs and I'm just getting around to mine. I never make resolutions. I did last year, but I think that was the new blogger in me, wanting an excuse to show off my Google image search skillage.

Truthfully, I've never seen the point. I'm skeptical that a specific date can pull a stand in for a life changing epiphany and cause you to change all the stuff about your life that makes you cringe. I mean, c'mon! But as George S. Patton is accused of saying:

"Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack."

Well ya got me, General.

Thursday night I couldn't be home. I got in my car and drove, I'm still not sure where I actually ended up. A 24 Hour Walgreens parking lot is all I know for certain. Then I just sat there, for hours, hurt and pissed off and wanting to hear anything but what was in my head. I woke up the next day around 4, with what I can only assume was a "life hangover".

I promptly laid in bed all day and watched reruns of Dead Like Me on Hulu. My body let me know it rejected my decision making by spitting out my left contact lens.

Perhaps the reason I reject the idea of yearly resolutions is that I have no resolution. I am neither firm nor determined. In fact, thinking about being either is liable to induce panic. Much in the same way as watching an oodle of Hulu only to realize that you ARE George*,

*For those who've never watched Dead Like Me, George (or Georgia) is the main character, a smart, yet apathetic teenage girl who doesn't realize that she never let herself experience life until after she's dead.

I guess what I'm getting at is life is way too short and I've wasted quite enough of mine anxiously worrying about failing at things I've never taken the chance to try, thank you.

So this year my biggest resolution... is to get some.*


*Hel-lo. My New Year's Resolution is to *get some* resolve. Thanks Wendiwinn, I didn't mean for my last line to be open to so much interpretation. Or did I?**

**No. No, I did not.



  1. That's funny you say that because my resolution last year was to "get more of the good stuff". Of course I was specifically refering to sex but there's lots of other good stuff in life too!

  2. I hope you get to follow up on your resolution!

  3. LOL! I was also like "get some". Geez the girl must have had some serious drought. I haven't made a NY resolution yet. Still thinking about what I need to change about myself.

  4. Your last line completely made me laugh out loud at my desk.

    I love the verbal faux pas....

  5. Go get you some!!!! heehee That was so funny.


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